not know

Elias had always had the answers. Until now. 

He sat numb at the repurposed wood table, a columbian dark roast in front of him, steaming calmly in a narrow stream. 

The magnitude of his uncertainty about everything, rippled like a sonic boom through his life space. He didn’t even like coffee, much less columbian dark roasts, but with the crippling confusion of what to do now, it was amazing that he had arrived anywhere, much less here, perched in a pool of sunlight in the neon flower decoupage cafe he hated so much. Self sabotage. Was he trying to rub it in? 

From two tables down, he noticed a woman in a slick leather jacket peddle her feet to a similar seat. Her glazed eyes fell to the window. The desolation in her demeanor silenced time. 

Elias focused. Slowly her eyes turned to meet his. 

“Bad day?” he called quietly, unsure if she would even be able to hear over the 80’s grunge music that echoed through the high ceilings. 

Her face contorted into a collection of looks before she reached for her coffee. Where to begin?

“Columbian dark roast,” she responded, raising her scalding paper cup. 

“Columbian dark roast.” he responded.

Elias had always had the answers. And although he didn’t know much about his current situation and had absolutely nothing on what would come once he left this cafe, this moment felt somehow okay. Being lost in nothing, and to not know with someone else. 

-b 

June 19, 2020